The Tinder Killer

I fiddled with the switch blade in my sweatshirt pocket as I walked to the meeting place. This dumb guy was going to be my what, sixth? No, seventh victim ever since this stupid app was released. I’ve developed a bit of a reputation in the entire state. The Tinder Killer. Although, I can’t take all the credit, the general public doesn’t know that. There’s been at least one other person using Tinder to meet up with people and kill them as well. Most people think I’m a lot worse than I actually am. The Tinder Killer has eleven kills under his belt, and so far only six of them are mine. Plus, whoever this guy is, they do things almost exactly like I do, with a blade. Except they’re way more brutal than I am. I keep things clean, a single slice to an artery and I allow them to bleed out. I may have one more kill under my belt but whoever the other killer is, uses stabs. Sometimes multiple stabs to the chest, neck, or even the face in a couple cases.

I flicked open the blade in my pocket as I approached the bench where I would meet this guy, “Tim”. Tim was supposed to be meeting a cute little blonde girl that goes by the name of Carly. I wonder what goes through people’s heads when they still use Tinder to hook up with people in this area. Maybe they don’t think that it could ever happen to them? I honestly don’t know because neither I nor the other killer exclusively kill men or women. We’re both free agents that play for both teams.

The light shining down on the bench by the lake had moths flickering about the light. The green paint peeling away from the wood on the seat looked as if a light rain would brisk the paint right off. I sat down on the bench and pulled out my phone. I pulled open the app and sent Tim a quick message telling him that I was here. Crickets chirped in the night, I looked at the moon reflecting on the lake. Every few seconds a blip in the water would ripple as a fish would pop up for a second.

A figure was approaching down the path to my left. They were wearing dark clothes and they had a hood up just like I did. Their phone was out, the backlight from the phone was illuminating the figure in the distance. I got a ding on my phone. The message on the app read, I’m here now too. I think I see you on the bench.

I stood up from the bench and turned to Tim, trying to hide my face with my hood, I waved to him with my phone in hand. He put his phone back in his pocket and continued to walk towards me. As he got closer I realized he looked much smaller than what his profile said. Tim was supposed to be fairly tall, a little over six feet tall and he looked much smaller than that. As Tim approached, he didn’t look much like Tim at all. He actually looked like a she.

She froze on the pathway and just stared at me, and I stared back. I was honestly at a loss for words. I didn’t know what to say. Did we just get double catfished? We were silently staring at each other for a few moments before I broke the silence. I approached a bit closer and pulled my hood down, I figured it was pretty clear that we weren’t who we said we were so revealing my face wouldn’t really matter anyway.

“Tim?” I asked.

The girl pulled her hood down as well. “Carly?”

“Well this is awkward.”

“Awkward? You’re posing as a girl on Tinder. You creep.”

“Oh I’m a creep? You’re one to talk.”

“Whatever, I don’t care. You’ll have to do.”

“What?? You want to hook up still?”

“NO! That’s not what, oh screw this.”

“Look why don’t we-”

“Just shut up,” the girl snapped as she pulled out a pistol and pointed it at me.

“Woah, woah, woah. Okay, okay easy,” I exclaimed as I held up my hands. As I pulled out my hands, my hands instinctively clenched on my knife and pulled it out of my pocket.

“Why do you have a knife?” she asked.

“In case I run into creeps like you.”

“Well, no use for a knife when I have a gun. So drop it, because I’m gonna kill you right now.”

“You’re gonna kill me? So why would I bother dropping the knife if you’re gonna shoot me anyway?”

“Just drop the knife!” she screamed.

“Why? Just shoot me and get it over with already.”

“I’m The Tinder Killer, I’ve killed eleven people. You think I’m kidding?”

“No you’re not.”

“You calling me a liar?”

“The Tinder Killer doesn’t kill with guns for one, and for two I’m The Tinder Killer.”

The girl lowered her gun and she smirked. “So you’re One Cut.”

“One Cut huh? Is that your name for me?”

“Yeah all of your kills have been with one cut to an artery,” the girl replied as she put her gun away.

Footsteps were approaching behind me, I turned to look over my shoulder and the other Tinder Killer leaned to look around my body at who was approaching. It looked like a couple holding hands, walking down the path at night. We both made eye contact and quickly sat next to each other on the bench. The couple got eerily quiet as they passed us and we both sat stiff as a board. Once they were out of earshot I broke the silence and relaxed my body.

“Well, I’ll keep your secret if you keep mine,” I muttered.

“Oh there’s no need for that.”

“Wha-” A sharp pain erupted from my chest and I immediately coughed violently, spewing blood down my chin. I looked down at my chest and a hand holding onto the hilt of a knife was protruding from the left side of my chest.

“What you didn’t think I was just going to let you go did you? The Tinder Killer, kills the Tinder Killer? That’s way too good of a headline.”

“You know,” I coughed, splattering blood onto my jeans. “I-I don’t know what I was expecting actually.”

I took a swig from my beer as she wrapped her arm around my waste. The bar was getting a bit crowded now and I was thankful to be sitting at a booth for our double date. “So how did you two meet? You’ve been dating for a few months now right?”

We both looked at each other and smirked. “Tinder actually.”

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